7 Constants Improve Relationships

Relationships, and especially relationships, are not easy. But they’re also not as awkward as they seem when we’re in the middle of a dispute. Some people are not able to interact with others because they are too shy. And some others carry a contradiction with them about their past. Perhaps they come from a family where the relationships between family members were not good. A past like that often tends to push people into constant conflict. They fight in struggles that lead nowhere, and they see all people with eyes of mistrust and fear.

We are not born to be able or incapable of creating good relationships. However, it is true that some of us are genetically predisposed, more or less, to be extroverted and social. But these are not the only determining factors. However, we need to learn how to interact with other people. This requires us to develop some abilities, and all of those abilities are within our reach.

There are certain tricks that make learning these abilities easier. They are just small tips that are easy to apply and are really effective for their purpose: to develop our personal relationships. Let’s see what they are…

Practice your listening skills

Listening is not, and should not be, limited to being silent when one is speaking. It’s something more: listening means paying attention to the form and content of another person’s message. It is not about being quiet. Listening means responding to what the other person is saying, saying, suggesting, or implying. It does not mean silencing our own internal dialogue. Instead, it means re-routing it to agree with what the other person is saying to us.

There is nothing better to develop our listening skills than listening ourselves. But how? Simply try to be quiet and understand what others are saying to you. In the beginning, you need to make a conscious effort to stay focused, and by practicing it, the temptation isn’t going to be that great.

Practice empathy

Active listening and empathy go hand in hand. Focusing our attention on a message conveyed by another person allows us to understand it according to the context of the other person, not our own. This is exactly what empathy is: the ability to step into another person’s shoes, and understand the process that makes them behave and think that way.

That is, empathy requires an open mind from us instead of a critical attitude. Everyone is what they are and do what they do for different reasons, which we may not understand. What right do we have to question them? In that sense, we would have a lot to lose if we couldn’t be empathetic. We lose opportunities to learn, opportunities to expand our experiences, and opportunities to develop our relationships.

Trust what you say and do

A confident attitude makes others trust you. And the opposite is also true. When someone is skeptical and insecure, others around him respond in defense. It is not very difficult to exercise self-confidence. Give a chance to the person you are, not forgetting that within that person you are the person you would like to be.

Fear is one of the factors that makes communication tense. Thus, it may be an obstacle to interpersonal relationships. But in many cases, distancing ourselves from its effects requires a little practice. When you speak, try not to take too many breaks, and try to engage in conversations instead of distracting from a monologue or giving a speech.

You don’t have to become a really talkative, fun or witty person. But what you need for communication is a little spontaneity. In this sense, your listener might get an idea of ​​thoughtful and practiced speech as an attempt to hide something… Although the only thing you try to hide is your fear of showing who you really are. Why?

Smile, always smile

The saying that a smile opens doors is old and common. A smile breaks down barriers and helps create a friendly environment. Smiles lower the excitement and they are also free!

To motivate you, think of a smile as a sign of peace and acceptance:  a friendly gesture that is unparalleled in supporting good communication. It is a gesture that breaks the ice and attracts confidence. There is nothing better for improving personal relationships than starting every interaction with a smile. Several studies show that people are much more likely to approach another person who is smiling than someone who is not smiling.

Good manners

Good manners never disappear from fashion. Nor do they cease to be the master key that opens all the doors. When practiced, they begin to feel much more natural. Then when you control them, you no longer feel like you are fake. Some people may interpret that as impersonality instead of respect and consideration.

Of course,  there are several norms related to compliments that are no more than decoration. Others are thorough and should not be forgotten. For example, good ways to greet people, say goodbye, thank you, interrupt others when they talk, let others step in the door first… These are small gestures that show your willingness to get along with other people.

With this in mind, it is important to emphasize the important aspect of one good practice that we have already lost. It’s about cell phones. It would be best for us to keep our phones out of sight so that they don’t bother us. The exception, of course, when we are waiting for an important call. You will not lose anything extremely important if you put your phone aside for a while. On top of all that, you have a lot to achieve if you do this.

Learn to control anger

Controlling anger, just like controlling any other emotion, is learnable. There is a golden rule for angry moments that might help us. If you are losing your temper, do these three things first: say nothing, do nothing, and be quiet. So easy. Anger has almost never helped resolve conflicts.

This is something you can learn by practicing. Wait until the energy that that feeling carries dissipates enough to be able to communicate again. Then when that energy is gone, you are again able to convey your message in the best way for both you and your relationship. At the same time, you show self-control as well as respect for yourself and the other party.

Relationships often deteriorate due to poor anger management. When anger takes over, we end up showing our downsides. We can even be really cruel. This happens especially when we are arguing with the people we love, because we know exactly how to hit them where they hurt.

Everything (or almost everything) is in the details

There are certain attitudes or small details that raise the level of human relationships considerably. They are small gestures that show generosity and goodwill towards others. It is a good idea to add these to your behavior. Some of these gestures are:

• Praise other people sincerely. Only a few of us make a way for ourselves to share good things with others about what we think of them. Saying these things out loud always brings satisfaction.
• Invite people using their names.
• He who experiences some problems always decides for himself how important they are.
• During a dispute, let the person you are arguing with know that you value his or her position and would like to understand it better.
• Show interest in another person’s thoughts and feelings.
• Don’t try to change anyone’s thoughts.

Good relationships are the result of effort. While some people come into this world better equipped to communicate with other people, we all have something to learn. This is especially justified when we have a long history of communication difficulties or our list of unresolved conflicts is long.

If you are able to improve the quality of your relationship or relationship, your whole life will be better. This will also make you feel more confident and it will also develop your overall well-being. When we have more constructive interactions with others, we will be more motivated and happier.