Courtship: A Lost Practice With Positive Aspects

If there’s anything that has changed radically in recent decades, it’s the way we start our romantic relationships. Courting is either on the verge of extinction or it is already completely extinct, at least to some extent. The culture of extreme speed has conquered even the most unimaginable areas, and among these areas is love.

Exactly,  “Quick Dating” defines much of a relationship today. It seems that courtship is no longer necessary today. And then there are couples who have had enough of a lack of emotion and magic. In other words, the lack of romance.

Courtship is not exclusively characteristic of humans. In fact, most animals have courtship rituals. Although they join together almost instinctively only to mate and make offspring, they do not perform this activity without an introduction. The purpose of this process is to communicate, synchronize, and prepare the terrain biologically, with the goal of maximizing fertility.

Courtship among people has lost much of its visibility. It is considered an unnecessary decoration. We say, “let’s see where this leads.” There is no “courtship” in the sense of this word. Instead, it has conflicting signals that lead to relationships that are meant to be temporary.

Often, two people aren’t even sure if they like each other. So what are those acts and elements of courtship that are a point of the past? Here are a few examples…

Flowers, courtship classic

Flowers are part of the universal language and an integral part of classical courtship. When someone receives flowers as a gift without having any special day like an anniversary or other holiday, they are a direct expression of love. Flowers are a compliment, and at the same time a nice way to show interest.

Today, giving flowers requires courage. For many, giving flowers is a corn symbol and also risky – receiving flowers can be refused. But it’s hard not to notice such a nice gift. Still, it is true that giving flowers requires courage, as flowers  openly declare that you are romantically interested in the person to whom you give them. This makes you vulnerable. 

Phones are not romantic

People feel so much fear of rejection that they look for distractions so they don’t have to express their feelings directly towards someone else. The phones are perfect for this. Phones allow us to show intermittent attention. If all goes well, the device will be ignored. But if there is tension in the relationship or things don’t slip, we turn our gaze towards our phone screen so we can avoid the situation.

Closing your phone and putting it aside can be a really nice gesture of courtship. This means that you are going to give your undivided attention to the person in front of you. This also means that you are not playing hide and seek and that you know what you really want. When you want to court someone, there is nothing better than noticing and feeling important to you.

What are we?

It’s really common for two people in a relationship not to know exactly what kind of relationship they’re really in. Nothing is talked about, and it is thought that naming a relationship means limiting the relationship or that it refers to commitment. However, leaving open the meaning of a relationship is not a good idea, as it is the best breeding ground for misunderstandings in a relationship.

Showing interest directly to another person does not mean that it becomes what it is in the movie “Dangerous Relationship.” Defining a relationship assures you that there is no reason for either party to be afraid or make false assumptions. Expressing what you want from a relationship is a way to build trust and allow everything to flow forward naturally.

Beautiful words

Words like “I like you” don’t always express what you really feel or want. Nor do they tell much to the person who hears these words. It’s one of those standardized expressions that sums up the idea that you want to start a relationship with another person, but that expression has no more meaning than that.

Beautiful and meaningful words never disappear from fashion. Many people sincerely admire another person but never say so. Either because they’re not used to expressing themselves, or they’re afraid they’re trying too hard and maybe they feel like the person they’re aiming for is in power. But there is no reason to be afraid. When it comes to courtship, beautiful words should always be expressed. They strengthen the relationship and give the relationship magic.

What makes courtship important is the special atmosphere that courtship gives to a relationship. Not only does it make the relationship more magical, but it also sets loving, respectful guidelines for the relationship. Take back that affection that felt so good. That is why we say that courtship could be a practice worth returning to…