Why Is A Child Unmotivated?

Is your child unmotivated? If you have a child who doesn’t want to do homework or chores or who responds apathetically to your requests, you may not understand the situation. It may be easy to just scold him, but before you do, you need to consider something.

Behind the lack of motivation, the child may hide something. This can be emotional emptiness, negative emotions, or other underlying problems. You need to figure out what is causing it.

Granted only. Many children and teenagers who are unmotivated become adults who are also unmotivated. What happens if a child gets used to constant frustration at an early age? What if everyone around him responds only with criticism and threats? The child becomes accustomed to chronic failure. His self-esteem weakens from an early age, and it is almost impossible to improve at a later age.

Lack of motivation or interest is really just a mask that hides a deeper problem. It reflects the internal state, and it is necessary to find out its causes as soon as possible. Why?

It is because there is nothing more dangerous and destructive than discouragement. This lack of motivation can cause a child to drift into a lack of interest in life itself. That constant frustration and the resulting behavior usually causes negative reactions in other people.

A child without motivation: what explains his attitude?

You probably agree that most people enjoy a curious child. It is fascinating to watch children who are connected to their environment, who ask and enjoy playing, and who are constantly moving, touching and experimenting. Childhood is full of movement and energy. It involves a desire to understand ourselves and our position in a reality where we constantly feel accepted and attached.

Maybe that’s why you might be so surprised to see a child without motivation. The child can only lie on the school desk or in bed. He may not only choose to be silent, but also defiantly refuse to perform any tasks you may ask of them.

If you encounter this situation often, you need to understand this. As Adele Gottfried explained in an article in the Journal of Educational Psychology , motivation is driven by emotion.

If a child, adolescent, or adult is constantly discouraged, there is likely to be a complex emotional reality behind the situation. If you punish a child for his attitude, you will only make him feel worse.

Why is a child without motivation?

There can be many things behind a child’s lack of motivation. Remember that children do not always have the ability to explain exactly what is happening to them. Therefore, you should have a close relationship with the child to make it easier for him or her to open up.

Now let’s look at some details about what can make a child lose motivation:

• Frustration with learning problems. Keep in mind that there may be a large number of children in a class with special educational needs that have not been identified. Inability to pay attention to the teacher’s teaching, dyslexia or something minor can lead to a lack of motivation in children.

• Bullying is also a common problem. Some families may not be aware of the daily trauma that their children experience at school. Do not rule out this possibility.
• Constant frustration is another common occurrence. Some children and young people move from the idea of ​​“I can’t do it” to the idea of ​​“I don’t want to do it” in a short amount of time. Teaching them early to deal with frustration, anxiety, and feelings of failure will help them mature in this regard.
• Many children experience stress. And more importantly, they want the attention of their parents. How can you help your child develop positive emotions so he or she can regain his or her motivation? The suggestion to play together or do other things with the family so that the child feels important, consulted and validated, contributes.

How can you treat your child’s or teen’s lack of motivation?

An unmotivated child does not need more reprimands or criticism. Rather, he needs attention. Try to put yourself in your child’s shoes for a moment. Remember how you feel when depression and apathy strike you. It’s not a pleasant feeling, is it?

Of course, it is true that as an adult, experience makes us think about what we can do to change the situation. However, children do not have the ability or experience to know how to react.

Some strategies

• Be empathetic. Keep a close relationship with your child so that he or she feels welcome instead of being condemned. The ideal situation is that your child feels comfortable enough to be able to tell you about their feelings.
• Positive speech. Using mentally positive communication also makes it easier to communicate with your child. Also, try to focus on the encouraging emotions that motivate your child. You can remind him of his strengths, his potential and opportunities. Create an emotional environment to make your child feel comfortable with you. This way, you can also help him find a new perspective on his problems.

• Start from the beginning. Sometimes you may have to start from scratch to regain lost motivation. You could do something as simple as change your daily routine and give your child encouragement, new challenges, and suggestions. This can help your child with frustration or negativity when they find new interests. Finding a new hobby (like sports, music, or painting) can work to get you motivated. You may also find new activities to help you connect with your child.

In short, a  child without motivation does not need criticism; he needs attention.  Don’t put it off until tomorrow, but open your eyes today. Motivation makes life meaningful. So don’t let your child lose that power in their lives.